Relationships

Websters lists the definition of relationship as 1: the state of being related or interrelated 2: the relation connecting or binding participants in a relationship: as a: kinship b: a specific instance or type of kinship 3 a: a state of affairs existing between those having relations or dealings b: a romantic or passionate attachment.

In this blog I am discussing b: a romantic or passionate attachment. How does one start a romantic or passionate attachment?

By allowing the walls that we each build around our hearts to be broken down. In order to be able to feel for someone we have to allow them access to our hearts. We have to be vulnerable, and being vulnerable is not comfortable. We are in essence saying, go ahead, I'm open, hurt me. Before we do that we evaulate the person. Are they trustworthy? If they are trustworthy you can move forward. Are they open? They might seem open at first then close up. If they close up you have to figure out if they are willing to open back up? This is a choice the other person has to make. You also have to decide if you are willing to wait, while your heart is still open and on the line. Can you be comfortable knowing that at any time the hammer can drop and you can get hurt.
For me this is so scary, to allow myself to love again, I am accepting that I have no control of my life. At any time this person can be taken from me. And while I did have a successful marriage for almost 22 years, what if my choice this time is wrong? I hate failure. Do you understand what I am saying? I detest failing. May I say that this whole issue scares me to DEATH.


Then if I open up my heart and am honest about it, is it going to scare them away? That is highly possible, and if I open my heart a little bit, I get freaked out by the thought that this person could die at any time and I will again experience pain that is beyond measure.


I have my fears and the other person has his fears. Wow! Happy medium would be lovely, how do I get there?